Daily3 Life’s Moments

**  Plant a tree or shrubs in your yard.

**  Organize a clean up day in your community.

**  When shopping, choose items with Least packaging.

Happy Earth Day!  Check out some of these interesting sites for celebrating earth day  :

Kaboose

Canadian Living

Earth Friendly Kids

**  Satellite clocks that do not tell the correct time???  We had a power outage for about an hour last night..when the power came back on, I DEPENDED on the satellite clock to set all my clocks…however, as I was to find out … my satellite clock was an hour behind!  Hmmm…how mysterious!

**  I have never witnessed snowstorm and thunderstorm happening at the same time…it was quite interesting as you watch out the window…heavy snow in strong winds and then claps of thunder.

**  How you cannot seem to find an item where you knew for sure where you had last left it.  You go back to that last location and the item is not there…you search everywhere for it but … mysteriously a few days later that same item is found back at the last location where you left it!!!

Do you have any mysteries in your life….unsolved????  Share with me!

**  Waking Up In The Morning

Waking up this morning I smile
knowing there are 24 brand new hours before me.
I vow to live fully in each moment,
and look at beings with eyes of compassion.

As we wake up in the morning and open our eyes we may like to recite the above gatha. We can start our day with the happiness of a smile and the aspiration to dedicate ourselves to the path of love and understanding. We are aware that today is a fresh, new day, and we have 24 precious hours to live.

Let us try to get up from bed right away after following three deep breaths to bring ourselves into mindfulness.  We may like to sit up and gently massage our head, neck, shoulders, and arms to get your blood circulating. We might like to do a few stretches to loosen our joints and wake up our body. Drinking a cup of warm water is also good for our system first thing in the morning.

Enjoy the dark morning sky. Many stars are twinkling and greeting us. Take deep breaths and enjoy the cool, fresh air.

**  Practice mindfulness daily :

1. Openness

Aware of the suffering created by fanaticism and intolerance, I am determined not to be idolatrous about or bound to any doctrine, theory or ideology, even Buddhist ones. Buddhist teachings are guiding means to help me learn to look deeply and to develop my understanding and compassion. They are not doctrines to fight, kill or die for.

2. Non-attachment to Views

Aware of suffering created by attachment to views and wrong perceptions, I am determined to avoid being narrow-minded and bound to present views. I will learn and practise non-attachment from views in order to be open to others’ insights and experiences. I am aware that the knowledge I presently possess is not changeless, absolute truth. Truth is found in life and I will observe life within and around me in every moment, ready to learn throughout my life.

3. Freedom of Thought

Aware of the suffering brought about when I impose my views on others, I am committed not to force others, even my children, by any means whatsoever – such as authority, threat, money, propaganda or indoctrination – to adopt my views. I will respect the right of others to be different and to choose what to believe and how to decide. I will, however, help others renounce fanaticism and narrowness through compassionate dialogue.

4. Awareness of Suffering

Aware that looking deeply at the nature of suffering can help me develop compassion and find ways out of suffering, I am determined not to avoid or close my eyes before suffering. I am committed to finding ways, including personal contact, images and sounds, to be with those who suffer, so I can understand their situation deeply and help them transform their suffering into compassion, peace and joy.

5. Simple, Healthy Living

Aware that true happiness is rooted in peace, solidity, freedom and compassion, and not in wealth or fame, I am determined not to take as the aim of my life fame, profit, wealth or sensual pleasure, nor to accumulate wealth while millions are hungry and dying. I am committed to living simply and sharing my time, energy and material resources with those in real need. I will practise mindful consuming, not using alcohol, drugs or any other products that bring toxins into my own and the collective body and consciousness.

6. Dealing with Anger

Aware that anger blocks communication and creates suffering, I am determined to take care of the energy of anger when it arises and to recognise and transform the seeds of anger that lie deep in my consciousness. When anger comes up, I am determined not to do or say anything, but to practise mindful breathing or mindful walking and acknowledge, embrace and look deeply into my anger. I will learn to look with the eyes of compassion on those I think are the cause of my anger.

7. Dwelling Happily in the Present Moment

Aware that life is available only in the present moment and that it is possible to live happily in the here and now, I am committed to training myself to live deeply each moment of daily life. I will try not to lose myself in dispersion or be carried away by regrets about the past, worries about the future, or craving, anger or jealousy in the present. I will practise mindful breathing to come back to what is happening in the present moment. I am determined to learn the art of mindful living by touching the wondrous, refreshing and healing elements that are inside and around me, and by nourishing seeds of joy, peace, love and understanding in myself, thus facilitating the work of transformation and healing in my consciousness.

8. Community and Communication

Aware that lack of communication always brings separation and suffering, I am committed to training myself in the practice of compassionate listening and loving speech. I will learn to listen deeply without judging or reacting and refrain from uttering words that can create discord or cause the community to break. I will make every effort to keep communications open and to reconcile and resolve all conflicts, however small.

9. Truthful and Loving Speech

Aware that words can create suffering or happiness, I am committed to learning to speak truthfully and constructively, using only words that inspire hope and confidence. I am determined not to say untruthful things for the sake of personal interest or to impress people, nor to utter words that might cause division or hatred. I will not spread news that I do not know to be certain nor criticise or condemn things of which I am not sure. I will do my best to speak out about situations of injustice, even when doing so may threaten my safety.

10. Protecting the Sangha

Aware that the essence and aim of a Sangha is the practise of understanding and compassion, I am determined not to use the Buddhist community for personal gain or profit or transform our community into a political instrument. A spiritual community should, however, take a clear stand against oppression and injustice and should strive to change the situation without engaging in partisan conflicts.

11. Right Livelihood

Aware that great violence and injustice have been done to the environment and society, I am committed not to live with a vocation that is harmful to humans and nature. I will do my best to select a livelihood that helps realize my ideal of understanding and compassion. Aware of global economic, political and social realities, I will behave responsibly as a consumer and as a citizen, not investing in companies that deprive others of their chance to live.

12. Reverence for Life

Aware that much suffering is caused by war and conflict, I am determined to cultivate non-violence, understanding and compassion in my daily life, to promote peace education, mindful mediation and reconciliation, within families, communities, nations and in the world. I am determined not to kill and not to let others kill. I will diligently practice deep looking with my Sangha to discover better ways to protect life and prevent war.

13. Generosity

Aware of the suffering caused by exploitation, social injustice, stealing and oppression, I am committed to cultivating loving kindness and learning ways to work for the well-being of people, animals, plants and minerals. I will practice generosity by sharing my time, energy and material resources with those who are in need. I am determined not to steal and not to possess anything that should belong to others. I will respect the property of others, but will try to prevent others from profiting from human suffering or the suffering of other beings.

14. Right Conduct

(For lay members): Aware that sexual relations motivated by craving cannot dissipate the feeling of loneliness but will create more suffering, frustration, and isolation, we are determined not to engage in sexual relations without mutual understanding, love, and a long-term commitment. In sexual relations, we must be aware of future suffering that may be caused. We know that to preserve the happiness of ourselves and others, we must respect the rights and commitments of ourselves and others. We will do everything in our power to protect children from sexual abuse and to protect couples and families from being broken by sexual misconduct. We will treat our bodies with respect and preserve our vital energies (sexual, breath, spirit) for the realization of our bodhisattva ideal. We will be fully aware of the responsibility of bringing new lives into the world, and will meditate on the world into which we are bringing new beings.

**  Beginning Anew

To begin anew is to look deeply and honestly at ourselves, our past actions, speech and thoughts and to create a fresh beginning within ourselves and in our relationships with others.

We practice Beginning Anew to clear our mind and keep our practice fresh. When a difficulty arises in our relationships with fellow practitioners and one of us feels resentment or hurt, we know it is time to Begin Anew.

1) Flower watering - This is a chance to share our appreciation with the other person. We may mention specific instances that the other person said or did something that we had admired. This is an opportunity to shine light on the other’s strengths and contributions to the sangha and to encourage the growth of his or her positive qualities.

3) Expressing a hurt - We may share how we felt hurt by an interaction with another practitioner, due to his or her actions, speech or thoughts. (To express a hurt we should first water the other person’s flower by sharing two positive qualities that we have trully observed in him or her. Expressing a hurt is often performed one on one with another practitioner rather than in the group setting. You may ask for a third party that you both trust and respect to be present, if desired.)

4) Sharing a long-term difficulty & asking for support- At times we each have difficulties and pain arise from our past that surface in the present. When we share an issue that we are dealing with we can let the people around us understand us better and offer the support that we really need.

The practice of Beginning Anew helps us develop our kind speech and compassionate listening. Begin Anew is a practice of recognition and appreciation of the positive elements within our Sangha. For instance, we may notice that our roommate is generous in sharing her insights, and another friend is caring towards plants.

Recognizing others positive traits allows us to see our own good qualities as well.
Along with these good traits, we each have areas of weakness, such as talking out of our anger or being caught in our misperceptions. When we practice “flower watering” we support the development of good qualities in each other and at the same time we help to weaken the difficulties in the other person. As in a garden, when we “water the flowers” of loving kindness and compassion in each other, we also take energy away from the weeds of anger, jealousy and misperception.

We can practice Beginning Anew everyday by expressing our appreciation for our fellow practitioners and apologizing right away when we do or say something that hurts them. We can politely let others know when we have been hurt as well. The health and happiness of the whole community depends on the harmony, peace and joy that exists between every member in the Sangha.

Try some of these and good luck!

Not everyone may know who she is but within the Chinese community, she is a very well known and well loved  actress (similar to someone like Faye Dunaway) in the Asian community.  This actress, Lydia Shum died of complications from liver cancer on February 19, 2008.  I remember watching her shows and her hearty laughter always put a smile on my face.  The news of her death has made me realize again how vulnerable our lives are on this planet and how we truly need to “live” everyday as if it were our last.  Her death also put many things into perspective for me in my own life.  Lydia will always be remembered.

**  Stephen Covey in his book “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” had written a scenario where the reader was to picture walking into a room where there were people in the room (some they know and some they may not know well); on the people’s faces were sorrowness…you don’t know exactly where you are but when you finally get to walk to the front of this room, you see something…and that something has made you realize that it is your own funeral!  The moral of this little scenario was : if you were to die today, what would this scenario look like?  Who would attend your funeral?  How would you be remembered as?  What would you like to be remembered as?  This little exercise was to make us all think about where our lives are at the present and find out where we want to be and most important WHAT we can do to make the necessary changes to better our lives.  This is also a great book…and is one of the books that I have on my list of books that have changed my life. 

**  Take care of yourself first before you can take care of others.  We tend to (particularly women) put other people infront of us.  If we don’t learn to put ourself first, then we are not going to be able take care of those we care about…what happens when we get sick?  Like in Lydia’s situation, the most important thing in her life is her daughter.  However, now that Lydia is gone, her daughter is left alone in this world — she may have relatives and friends but it’s not the same.  Luckily Lydia has financially provided security for her daughter (probably for the rest of her life) but what her daughter would give to have her mom spend just a few more years with her.  In Lydia’s case, her daughter is well cared for from friends and family…but in most cases, we are not so lucky.  You hear many stories that children are left with no one close to take care of them when their parent(s) had to leave them suddenly.  It is sad but true.  I think of my own children…and I am suddenly in a panic mode because I don’t think we are that all prepared for our children if something happened to us.  This has been a wake up call for me to :  take better care of my health, make sure I have a will and trust put in place, and the hardest is to find someone we can trust to love our children the way we would love them if something did happen to us prematurely and our children are left alone.

**  Financial Security.  No matter how we see money, it is important.  We are so influenced by ads about “things” we NEED that we forget the true importance of what we REALLY NEED.  Do we really need that extra big flat screen TV?  Do we need the latest handbag?  Do we need the latest fashion accessories?  Sometimes I will fall into this trap (usually this happens when I am in a slump and i watch too much TV).  I will start to think like what the advertisers want me to think…that I need to SPEND money!!!  Then at the end of the year we realize we are in serious debt and have not put in place a plan for financial security for our family.  I take Lydia’s death as a wake up reminder for me to FOCUS and stop spending on frivolous things.  Your kids DO NOT need the latest Nintendo, SONY Playstation; what they need is QUALITY time with you, your love and knowing the fact you will TAKE CARE of them.  So, if you haven’t already done so, put forth a plan on how you will better care for your children.

**  To Kill A Mockingbird — Harper Lee

**  Siddhartha — Herman Hesse

**  A Tree Grows in Brooklyn — Betty Smith

What are books that you have read that have made an impact on how you live?

** Happiness — we all define happiness differently.  What may be happiness for you may not be happiness for me.  However, I do know that no amount of money can buy happiness.  I have come to know  many people and families who are what I deem “well off” who has never and will never find happiness.  The reason is because they think having financial security will bring happiness and well roundedness in their lives and the lives of their families…in reality…it doesn’t.  Yes, it brings financial security but these families live very lonely lives…what they realize is that money can only buy “temporary” happiness…true happiness comes from being secure with who you are and all that God has given you.  Material goods can never buy happiness.  Unfortunately, this is what we are teaching our kids — for our lack of quality time we spend with them we try to make it up with material goods.  Have you ever noticed that in our materialistic world these days, in order to “maintain” this so called happiness, we always have to “buy” more and more goods just to sustain this sense of false happiness?  After the initial “high” of buying something is over, we go back into our “slump” and then we feel like we have to purchase more and better stuff to “get back” that happiness.  This becomes a vicious circle…as a result, we end up with a house full of “things” we DON’T need and we still haven’t achieved TRUE Happiness. 

One of my all time favourite books is “City of Joy” and I would recommend everyone to read this book.  For those who have read it, I would love to hear your reviews!

**  Compassion — more so than ever we need compassion in this world we live in.  There too many sufferings that many of us tend to close our doors and view these sufferings as “other people’s sufferings”.  Unfortunately, they are OUR sufferings too.  It is important for us to understand that in order to make this world a better place to live in and a healthier place to live in, we all need to help each other.  Homelessness, prostitution, spousal abuse, just to name a few, is not OTHER people’s problem, it is our problem too and we need to help as much as we can. 

It is important for us to try to put ourselves in other people’s shoes.  It is nice that we have a warm, loving home to live in, we have many friends who care for us, but there are many people out there not so fortunate.  WE can all pitch in and help…the simplest thing we can do EVERYDAY is SMILE!  It is amazing how just flashing a smile at someone can uplift their maybe not so sunny day.  So, if there nothing else you feel you can do — then try smiling.  Obviously what I am writing here is quite simple..my goal here is to hopefully start a dialogue and get people interested and hopefully because of this, they start taking on their own research and initiative to helping others and become more compassionate.

** Unconditional Love — I think I am pretty safe to say that no one shows this better than animals.  I have learned so much from my loving little yorkie.  Anytime I am having a horrible day, my little yorkie is always there giving me lots of loving kisses and attention.  Those of you who owns a pet will be able to understand better what I am saying. 

One change I have made and am still making is trying not to buy too many “things” for my kids.  I tend to go off the deep end with this…I am now spending more “quality” time with my kids (ie. doing arts and crafts, taking walks (when possible–especially during winter months)outside or we just go “mall” walking, etc).  This is one challenge I have made for myself this year… 

I hope this post inspires you to look deeply into your life and will also inspire you to start thinking about your life and to make the change(s) you feel important or necessary. 

Thanks for the comment Late Bloomer, I think this is a great theme for today’s post.  So, I’ve thought about this and these are the 3 that are most important for me and my family!  Do share some of the important actions that you believe are important to raise environmentally friendly kids.

**  First and foremost, YOU need to set an example and be environmentally friendly yourself.  Your kids will not follow what you “preach” if you don’t set an example yourself.

**  For younger children, they can help the family put recylables into the appropriate recycle bins.  This way, they will know the difference between things that are “garbage” and those that can be recycled.  Further, you can take them along with you when you bring the recyclables to the recycle depot.  I am sure your kids will have lots of questions from what this place is…to what do they do with the recyclables you dropped off.

**  Our family has always made it a priority to conserve energy and water so this is automatically passed on through to our kids.  We explain to them the importance of turning off lights and turning off the water while we’re brushing our teeth, etc…

I don’t have too much yet on older kids as my kids are still fairly young.  So much of what we do to teach our kids to be more environmentally friendly is geared towards kids still in preschool.  I believe the most important thing is to be eco friendly yourself first…You need to set an example.  There are tons of information at your local library…children’s books on the environment suitable for all ages.  Good luck!

Share your eco friendly practices!

** Popcorn, Popcorn and more Popcorn

** Spicy Peanuts or Spicy Almonds

** Any Mr. Christie Cookies

What are some of your favourite late night snacks?  Share with me!

**  Silk fortified soy milk — because my son has been diagnosed to be allergic to dairy products and to our family dog!!!

**  Homemade honey mustard sauce — 1/4 honey; 3/4 mayo and a pinch of mustard.  Very good with anything…especially french fries!

 **  Korean spicy instant noodles — yummy noodles with a bit of homemade kimchi — deeeeelicious.

** There are no direct eye contact - - they usually shift their gaze to the floor or somewhere else but not looking at you when talking to you.

** Their reason or explanation is short and makes no sense at all — the answer given seemed like something that has popped into their head; they’re choppy; they’re fillers — just so they can GIVE you an answer

** They add too much to their reasoning or explanation.

Here are some more ways to tell that someone is lying. How do YOU tell someone is not telling the truth?